I know I have not updating in a long while. Much has changed in my life...

As some know... and others will learn... many months ago I fell in love with a man who makes my heart sing. Because of him I smile true smiles of happiness and cry tears of joy. I adore him. I cherish him. I love him unconditionally.

We originally met online in 1998 in a chatroom. No we didn't fall all over each other right away. I was jaded. He was scared. The time was not right for either of us. But we became friends. Last year I began to realize how I might be feeling for him, but I kept those feelings locked far away. That scared me. I have been hurt so much in the past. No way was I ready to open myself up to care for another again. My heart was not ready. My psyche was not ready.

Earlier this year I finally began to heal enough and be brave enough to open up to him. It has been a long and scary road for me, because I have more than my share of skeletons, demons, and ghosts in my closet, under the bed and in the attic. But over time I have shared all of my deep dark secrets with him, subconsciencely trying to scare him away. Though many of my beasties did scare him, they didn't scare him away. Never once did he run.

We have our issues and challenges. I know my health conditions are not easy to live with for me, let alone another person. I swore long ago I would not be a burden to another. I am also older than him... by 7 years, 3 months, 2 weeks less 3 minutes. For a long time I hid behind my disabilities and my age. They scare me as well as him. But we are dealing with them one baby step at a time.

Our friendship grew and so did our feelings. One day I realized that not only did I love him, but that I was IN love with him! This shocked me because I didn't think I was capable of loving someone so deeply again. Totally. Completely. Unconditionally.

We had talked for a few months about me coming to Atlanta for a visit. Things changed in my life and I made the decision to actually move to Atlanta. I would get my own apartment and we would see how things went. No pressure and no promises. We would see face to face if what we were feeling from a distance would have the needed chemistry face to face. I must admit I was a wreck! *L* I knew that I would definitely feel chemistry towards him, but would he towards me? All my silly female insecurities made me a neurotic mess!!!

On August 1st, I hopped a Greyhound to Atlanta to begin a new chapter in my life. I took 5 suitcases/trunks with me, leaving all else behind. I wasn't sure what I would find when I got there, but I knew what I felt in my heart and I knew that if nothing else, I would have a fantastic friend.